Hardcover
Master the art of speaking up or staying silent for better relationships.
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Should I Say Something?

The Science of What to Share—and What to Keep to Yourself

$48.90

  • Hardcover

    256 pages

  • Release Date

    8 December 2026

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Summary

A social psychologist and Cornell professor of organizational behavior reveals the business and life benefits of knowing when to say something-and when to keep things to yourself.

Should I ask an upset colleague what’s wrong? Should I tell my bestie the truth when she asks about her new haircut? Should I tell my boss about my personal struggles? Should I apologize, even though it wasn’t my fault? Should I tell my friend her spouse is cheating on her? Should I tell my classmate I got t…

Book Details

ISBN-13:9780306835704
ISBN-10:0306835703
Author:Vanessa Bohns
Publisher:Hachette Books
Imprint:Da Capo Press Inc
Format:Hardcover
Number of Pages:256
Release Date:8 December 2026
Dimensions:152mm x 229mm
A-Format
B-Format
Should I Say Something? by Vanessa Bohns - ISBN: 9780306835704
152 × 229 mm
C-Format
A4
mm / in
What They're Saying

Critics Review

“Should I Say Something? is a wise and generous book that is also deeply useful. Bohns encourages us to push past either-or thinking and to approach our relationships with a long-term view. What I especially love is that she takes human beings seriously - as moral actors, social creatures, and people capable of being both tough and kind.”–Daniel H. Pink, #1 New York Times bestselling author of The Power of Regret and Drive
“A must read and rare find, a book that is equal parts comforting and wise. Decisions about whether to speak up and what to say cause anxiety, doubt, and indecision. Fortunately, Bohns gives us the guidance we need in any situation, backed by science and served with a healthy dose of empathy.”–Alison Fragale, Ph.D., organizational psychologist and bestselling author of Likeable Badass: How Women Get the Success They Deserve
“Addressing a range of situations, including sharing criticism, secrets, and bad news…Readers will find this both entertaining and deeply informative.”–Publishers Weekly, starred review
“In this deeply compelling and practical book, Vanessa Bohns explores the science of what we should share, what we should keep to ourselves, and how to get smarter about these often consequential decisions. Blending cutting-edge research with counterintuitive tips, Dr. Bohns offers a roadmap for navigating some of the most critical moments in our personal, professional, and everyday lives.”–Tomas Chamorro-Premuzic, professor of business psychology at University College London and author of Don’t Be Yourself: Why Authenticity is Overrated and What to Do Instead
“It’s one of those issues we all struggle with at times: should we or shouldn’t we say what’s on our minds? In this deeply researched and incisive book, superstar social psychologist Vanessa Bohns provides us with a gift: a crisply written, science-based guide for deciding when to open our mouths and when to keep them shut. Essential reading.”–Ethan Kross, International Bestselling Author of Chatter and Shift
“This book will change how you give feedback, share news, and handle every difficult conversation you’ve been avoiding. Vanessa Bohns delivers a framework that’s both fascinating and truly useful.”–Dorie Clark, Wall Street Journal and USA Today bestselling author of The Long Game
“Vanessa Bohns is one of our sharpest researchers on the science of social influence – and in Should I Say Something?, she has turned that expertise into a book that is as entertaining as it is indispensable. Her research-backed answers to the dilemmas we all face – ‘Do I share this? Say nothing? Apologize?’ – are both illuminating and immediately actionable. I’ve already found myself returning to her advice when I’m unsure whether to speak up or stay silent.”–Amy Gallo, author of Getting Along: How to Work with Anyone (Even Difficult People) and contributing editor at Harvard Business Review

About The Author

Vanessa Bohns

Vanessa Bohns, PhD, is a social psychologist, a full tenured professor of organizational behavior at Cornell University, and an award-winning researcher and teacher. She holds a PhD in social psychology from Columbia University and a BA in psychology from Brown University. She is also the author of You Have More Influence Than You Think.

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