Creating Compassionate Kids

Young children look to the adults in their lives for everything. Sometimes we're prepared for their questions and sometimes we're not.All child development research is clear about the importance of language and conversation in successful childhood outcomes for knowledge, attention, memory and learning. Recent research has also shown that effective conversations with children can make a difference in how they feel about themselves and the world in terms of empathy, resilience and compassion. Yet there are few books that show parents the practicalities of having these conversations.

In this book, Shauna Tominey, formerly the director of early childhood programming and teacher education at Yale Child Study Center, provides scripts for conversations parents should have with young children to address complex subjects like peer pressure, divorce and stress, as well as larger world issues. Parents are guided through sample discussions with research-based advice for creating dialogues that teach compassion and self-esteem.

“"With deep sensitivity and humanity, Dr. Tominey illuminates how our everyday conversations shape who we are and what we become. Tominey captures the heart of what kids are implicitly asking and seeking. With impeccable perception and rare insight, she explains how to talk to children about real-world topics, while also providing essential messages to help them develop into confident, caring, and compassionate people. Grounded in emotion science that's conveyed with the same warmth and wisdom she promotes, Creating Compassionate Kids is a beacon for 21st century families."”

Creating Compassionate Kids goes beyond educating parents. All those who interact with kids of any age will find it a useful tool to consult. . . A must-read for all who strive to raise compassionate children today.-- "Booklist"
Creating Compassionate Kids is a must-read book for anyone working with or raising young people. Infusing research and examples from her personal and professional life as a parent, researcher, and parent educator, Dr. Tominey helps us have vulnerable, courageous, and loving conversations that foster compassion in adults and young people alike. Dr. Tominey's writing is approachable and informative, and she equips her reader with actionable and developmentally-appropriate tools for creating compassionate kids.--Dena N. Simmons, EdD, CHES, Assistant Director, Yale Center for Emotional Intelligence, Associate Research Scientist, Yale Child Study Center
Developing compassion begins with understanding, and for young children, understanding emerges in conversation. Written with wisdom and sensitivity, Creating Compassionate Kids guides adults into these conversations and their significance to young children. Through conversational examples that are insightfully discussed, Shauna Tominey provides thought-provoking reflections on the growth of compassion and its foundations in developing self-awareness, resilience, and close relationships in childhood. A valuable resource for adults who care for kids.--Ross A. Thompson, PhD, Distinguished Professor, Department of Psychology, University of California Davis
In Creating Compassionate Kids, Dr. Tominey communicates the power of adult-child conversation through compelling and descriptive examples, and an engaging narrative that embeds key insights from developmental science. Family activities, book recommendations, and discussion questions provide wonderful opportunities to extend and apply learning. You'll finish the book feeling inspired and empowered to turn everyday moments into opportunities to support the next generation of compassionate children.--Elisabeth O'Bryon, Ph.D., co-founder of Family Engagement Lab
Preparing children for the world they will face may seem overwhelming for many parents. Yet, through the conversations they have, the way they respond to their children and the world around them, parents have a lot more power than they might imagine. . . . Creating Compassionate Kids demystifies the process and shows parents just how to use their conversations to instill essential messages for their children. The result is not only more compassionate kids, but likely more compassionate parents.-- "Psych Central"
With deep sensitivity and humanity, Dr. Tominey illuminates how our everyday conversations shape who we are and what we become. Tominey captures the heart of what kids are implicitly asking and seeking. With impeccable perception and rare insight, she explains how to talk to children about real-world topics, while also providing essential messages to help them develop into confident, caring, and compassionate people. Grounded in emotion science that's conveyed with the same warmth and wisdom she promotes, Creating Compassionate Kids is a beacon for 21st century families.--Kathryn Lee, Director of RULER for Families, Yale Center for Emotional Intelligence

Shauna Tominey, PhD, is an assistant professor of practice and parenting education specialist at Oregon State University. She lives in Corvallis, Oregon.

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