The Parenting Paradox

You love your child so much, but they seem to be suffering. What more can you do? Simple: Adjust what you can adjust—you! This very compassionate, non-shaming, real-world guide will tell you how. – Lenore Skenazy, president of Let Grow, author of Free-Range Kids
The Parenting Paradox equips parents to dial back anxiety, stay grounded, and thoughtfully make space for their kids to grow. Blending clinical expertise, real-life case studies, and actionable advice to guide readers in self-reflection and intentional parenting, this book offers invaluable insight for anyone seeking a more satisfying, meaningful connection with their children. – Darby Saxbe, PhD, professor of psychology at the University of Southern California and author of Dad Brain: The New Science of Fatherhood
The Parenting Paradox is a rare, refreshing antidote to intensive parenting culture. Dr. Brown invites parents to shift from fixing their children to growing themselves, offering a calm, steady path toward clarity, confidence, and genuine connection at home. – Bryana Kappadakunnel, author of Parent Yourself First
This is an important book for parents—and for all who work with them. The point about easing pressure on kids is vital, and this book adds concrete advice on how parents can do so, grounded in the author’s research and clinical experience. Such guidance has been largely missing from previous discussions, and I sincerely believe it can move the conversation forward. – Peter N. Stearns, co-author of The American Child: The Transformation of Childhood Since World War II, professor emeritus at George Mason University
Filled with enlightening case studies and gentle encouragement, this is a welcome resource for overstressed parents. * Publishers Weekly *
This book captures the confusion, the challenges, and the stress of parenting today while exploring the irony that the more we do for our kids, and the more we try to rescue them - we often unintentionally make it harder for our kids to grow well and thrive! Dr Jenny Brown writes with compassion and commonsense and gives insights and scripts that every family can use to transform conflict, reduce anxiety and focus on building strengths in our kids rather than fixing deficits. This excellent book affirms so much of my work, and it needs to be in every home from birth. – Maggie Dent, parenting educator, podcaster & author of Girlhood, Parental As Anything and From Boys to Men
When a parent makes themselves the project, and not the child, everyone is freed up to be a little more responsible for themselves. Differentiation-based parenting is for anyone who wants to relate to their child from a more solid, principled position. – Kathleen Smith, PhD, author of True to You and Everything Isn’t Terrible
Unsure about adding another book to your list? This one might just change how you think about youth mental health and parenting altogether. Not a how-to manual, this is something more profound yet still practical. A paradigm shift. A lighthouse of principles to guide the way toward growth and hope for families. – Emma Share, LMSW, MPH, University of Michigan Child & Adolescent Outpatient Psychiatry
A sophisticated, sometimes challenging guide through the complexities of being a parent. * The Sydney Morning Herald & The Age *

Jenny Brown, PhD, has worked in child and family mental health for the past four decades. She is regularly sought out as a thought leader in children’s mental health through her research, writings, social media, and speaking platforms.

Dr. Brown developed The Parent Hope Project that provides psychoeducation for parents and training for professionals to use a unique intervention method for parents with a struggling child. Dr. Brown is also the author of Growing Yourself Up: How to Bring Your Best to All of Life’s Relationships.

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