How Not to Be a Dick

Essential (and emotionally intelligent) etiquette tips are packaged here alongside hilarious "Dick and Jane"–style illustrations. Laugh and learn.

On the one hand, nobody wants to be a dick. On the other hand, dicks are everywhere! They cut in line, talk behind our backs, recline into our seats, and even have the power to morph into trolls online. Their powers are impressive, but with a little foresight and thoughtfulness, we can take a stand against dickishness today.

How Not to Be a Dick is packed with honest and straightforward advice, divided into the categories of relationships, home, school, work, play, in transit, and on the internet. Paired with this essential wisdom are playful illustrations showing two well-meaning (but not always well behaved) young people as they confront moments of potential dickishness in their everyday lives. Sometimes they falter, sometimes they triumph, but they always seek to find a better way. And with their help, you can too.

Commended for Independent Publisher Book Awards (Humor) 2014

“"Really? An etiquette book for teens? Yes, really, you butt-faced jerk! See, that right there is 'dickish behavior,' a timeless plague for which Doherty has a cabinet full of cures. The atmosphere is pure Dick and Jane: fussy early-reader prose married to bland clip-art-style illustrations starring a deadpan boy and girl. Through these old-fangled characters, Doherty fires absurd twenty-first-century zingers that happen to be really, really, really funny. (When was the last time you LOL'd at a nonfiction book?) Droll humor is one thing, but does Doherty deliver substance? Shockingly, she does, offering teens blunt, no-nonsense advice on the adult world that awaits them....Given the emphasis on roommates, office parties, and alcohol, this is clearly the gift book for next year's high-school and college grads. After all, we all need the occasional reminder that peeing in the shower is wrong."”

"Amen! - a parenting book for crummy parents like me. It's not so much a parenting book, per se - no, it really is an etiquette book. But the tone and language used is straightforward and speaks to teens and young adults in a manner that they understand. And all that stuff you learned in parenting class? It's back, and much more applicable than you thought. . . . The book is rated for 18+, but honest to God, I'll let my 12-year-old daughter read it. There's nothing inappropriate in terms of language or subject matter, I think, for middle schoolers, and frankly, that's where the seeds of dickishness are usually planted." Chicago Now
“Really? An etiquette book for teens? Yes, really, you butt-faced jerk! See, that right there is 'dickish behavior,' a timeless plague for which Doherty has a cabinet full of cures. The atmosphere is pure Dick and Jane: fussy early-reader prose married to bland clip-art-style illustrations starring a deadpan boy and girl. Through these old-fangled characters, Doherty fires absurd twenty-first-century zingers that happen to be really, really, really funny. (When was the last time you LOL’d at a nonfiction book?) Droll humor is one thing, but does Doherty deliver substance? Shockingly, she does, offering teens blunt, no-nonsense advice on the adult world that awaits them….Given the emphasis on roommates, office parties, and alcohol, this is clearly the gift book for next year’s high-school and college grads. After all, we all need the occasional reminder that peeing in the shower is wrong.”  Booklist (Starred Review)

Meghan Doherty has illustrated the Zest books Undecided and Super Pop. She previously wrote for the Brooklyn-based web magazine Brokelyn and has created websites and posters for a variety of clients.

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